I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
