How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
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Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
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Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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