today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found the puke drawer
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize