if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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