32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
