i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
