hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
