His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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