2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
