when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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