yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
