I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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