Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
