I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Dignity is for republicans.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize
