just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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