i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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