They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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