im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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