38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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