Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
