there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize