yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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