you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
