she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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