so explain again why im purple
no
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
