You're completely useless in the revolution.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
