Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Randomize