found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
