handjob tips. give me some.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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