his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
