Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Your dad touched me again.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I think a kid would responsible me up
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
