Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
