nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
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the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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