i was born a porn star she said
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I came so hard my ears popped.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize