the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I take back everything I said about communal showers
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
