it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
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