I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
