OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
