you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.