I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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