just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
