so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
