i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize