we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
