she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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