Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize