i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
