this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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