i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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