last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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